Actors with Great Voices

Sometimes there are actors out there whose primary charms--their gravitas, charisma, carriage, what have you--are personified by their voices. That doesn't mean their voices have to be their only talent, only that it's an important ingredient in an already wonderful actor-y stew. Here are some of my faves in the vocal dee-partment:

Christopher Lee
I think I've gone over this one, haven't I? Let's just allow his King Haggard to speak for himself.





Ronald Colman
He possesses the quintessential uppercrust British accent, all sexy and suave. Here's a link to his appearances on the Jack Benny radio program, where he's the perfect Wilson to Benny's Dennis.
http://theoldtimeradioshow.com/jack-benny-and-ronald-coleman/


George Sanders
Combines Colman's aristocratic suavity with Lee's commanding basso profund...ity? Anyways, hot. Could anyone else voice a tiger so realistically (and strangely sexily? Don't judge me I'm not a furry!!)?





Maximilian Schell
The Grim Reaper in vocal form. Absolutely chilling, yet engrossing.

I've never seen this, but it looks super depressing. You're welcome!




Leonard Nimoy
No, I'm not going to post "Bilbo Baggins!" Just this weirdness:




George Takei's voice ain't bad, either, and can be really funny, too.


He's also very fun to imitate. Go ahead, give it a shot!


Dan Castellaneta (I've come to terms with the fact I'll never be able to spell his surname without looking it up first)

Of course everyone in The Simpons cast has an amazing set o'pipes, but Castellaneta (yup, had to look) gets the most props because his natural voice sounds nothing like Homer's--in fact, the exact opposite: sorta high-pitched, actually.




Margaret Sullavan
"Strange, fey, mysterious--like a voice singing in the snow."
--Louise Brooks




Lauren Bacall
There's something very comforting and down-to-earth about her husky voice. There's a scene in The Big Sleep where tension is high, and Bogie is alone in his office, and we're all a little scared for him. Then he calls Baby on the phone and we hear her say "Hello?" And suddenly the world's a better, sultrier place.

This isn't the scene, but it's still a classic, and still has to do with a phone: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DwXc4N_10rA&feature=related


Gracie Allen
"The moment I heard her voice I figured she had to be a dancer. She sounded like the bird who had been thrown out of the nest for singing off-key. In fact, it turned out to be a perfect voice. It had no lows, so it projected beautifully in a theater. Gracie never had to yell to be heard, her voice just cut through everything else. And years later, when she started singing on the radio, it turned out she had a lovely singing voice. Like Gracie herself, her voice was unforgettable."
--George Burns





Tuesday Weld
And just like this actress, Tuesday's voice was bubbly, garrulous, and slightly deranged. Adorable.

It might not have translated the best to singing, but I still can't help but dig her shot at a single in 1960. Still got plenty of personality:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uSeCHLPp0zs

Stuck in your head yet? Excellent.


Kathryn Leigh Scott
Having played the bulk of the female leads, such as Maggie Evans, Josette, and all of Josette's various incarnations, Scott was arguably the most charming actress on Dark Shadows. I think her cheerful, lively voice has a lot to do with that. It's very versatile, too.

This video's pretty long and contains one of them sweeping, dramatic, climactic spoiler moments. Hey, look, it's in the title! Sorry, but anyone who knows anything about Dark Shadows should already know about this twist. In case you don't want to watch the whole thing you can just listen a few seconds, and you can hear her disembodied voice...or is it really hers?!




Michelle Pfeiffer
Similar to Bacall, Pfeiffer's got the pefect wry, femme fatale vibe going on with her voice. But where she lacks Bacall's comforting tones, she makes up for it in quirkiness and electricity. And like Weld, Pfeiffer loses none of her cheek when she belts one:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DIsETmNtNTs


Arleen Sorkin
Modern day Lina Lamont, only not as grating and with an extra dash of insanity.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vp6wLXj4-5A


Tara Strong
She's basically in every cartoon show ever. Her voice is probably less distinctive than Sorkin's, but I'd argue she's more versatile because of it. In fact, she can even do a pretty mean Harley herself, as evidenced in this trailer for the upcoming Arkham City video game.

Vid is super loud, sorry.



And of course, while we're on the subject, Mark Hamill. You already heard his Joker above, but...heck, why not another dose?



So, who am I forgetting? There are many. I've left out obvious contenders like James Earl Jones, Orson Welles, and Sean Connery. But who else?

Note to the internet: seriously, guys, why you gotta disable so much embedding code? Can't we all be friends?

Speaking of The Simpsons...PREPARE TO BE TRAUMATIZED

Apropos my Mindy Simmons post a few weeks back, I figured why not pay further tribute to The Simpsons by celebrating with this little bijou? A realistic rendering of Mr. Burns rising out of a nuclear tower from the waist up, like some kind of radioactive centaur!

Shot taken from this guy's blog 

IT TASTES LIKE BURNING!

All...all I was looking for was a picture of Will There Ever Be A Rainbow, Mr. Burns's autobiography. Why did this have to happen?

Anyways, sharing the visual torture. The torture that's also secretly delightful. To wash your eyes out so you'll still like me, here's the cover I was talking about:

Taken from this tumblr

"Hello, my name is Mr...Snrub. Yes, that will do."

See? Much better.

If I Could Be One Fictional Character, I'd Be Mindy Simmons

 

Keep in mind this was The Simpsons at its best, Season Five's The Last Temptation of Homer. Season Five was a solid time for the series, before the creative team stretched themselves too hard trying to match the more random, manic, and less character-driven formulas that might work for such shows as South Park and occasionally Family Guy, but a recipe that often falls flat on The Simpsons. Yet conversely, the show had also been around long enough to produce episodes more confident and sophisticated than some of the very early Season One shows that, despite many golden moments of their own, had yet to really establish that classic Simpsons rhythm. Most fans agree Seasons 3-6 were probably the series at its absolute best.

It is in this perfect era we meet Mindy Simmons. She's some kind of engineer who's been brought in to put the Affirmative in the nuclear power plant's fledgling Action. Homer is immediately drawn to her, and she to him (no, this is not why I idolize her: even with my established quirky taste in men, I draw the line at Homey).

 

Why The Simpsons remains such a cultural milestone long after its run its course and is now not...very...shall I say...good, is because of the way the writers handle this dilemma. Obviously, Homer can't really err from Marge. That would take things too far. So equally obviously, Mindy can't be a permanent character. She's a one-off. So it would be easy to make her a one-dimensional floozy, good for a couple cheap laughs on account of that flooziness. 

Yet what the writers do instead, which is what helps make Mindy such a fantastic character despite her one-episode appearance, is make her just as conflicted as Homer, and just as ultimately kind-hearted, too. She doesn't want to be a homewrecker. However, as I believe showrunner Al Jean said in this episode's commentary, "these two characters just can't control their libidos around each other." In a hilarious sequence in the plant's tiny elevator, she and Homer are smashed nose-to-nose in the cramped space of the box. Instead of smirking and flirting, Mindy unknowingly imitates Homer, whispering to herself with eyes closed, "Think unsexy thoughts, think unsexy thoughts." Then she smiles the same awkward, loopy grin as Homer.

Now we get to the real, mean and dirty reason I wish I could be just like her: she makes being the female equivalent of Homer attractive and charming. Like Homer, she loves hogging down donuts like a pig ("I dunno. Pigs tend to chew. I'd say he eats more like a duck"--sorry, wrong episode, but still a classic line). She enjoys sneaking in a nap before lunch. She gets excited about the prospect of free shower curtains in a hotel room. She yells "get bent" at someone criticizing their nuclear panel at a convention. She makes that same beloved gargling noise in the back of her throat when she thinks about the words "double glaze". 

She is Homer, as a foxy redhead.

Does that mean she also has his lack of intelligence? Well, that's difficult to gauge. We never really see her working at her job, though Smithers mentions as an afterthought that she has some sort of relevant degree. She's probably more competent than Homer, but we can't know that for certain: after all, Homer works at the plant. Competence is apparently not high on Burns's list of desired qualities for employees (competence might foster independent thinking). 

If Mindy is as stupid as Homer, would that make me want to be her any less? Well... "Short answer 'yes' with an 'if', long answer 'no', with a 'but'." Yeah, I'd like to emulate somebody intelligent, wouldn't we all? Least that's what my ego dictates. However, there is that small, petty, corpulent little gal called my id, who dances around in a devil costume shaking maracas, singing, "I am evil Laura! I am evil Laura!" This primitive imp wouldn't mind getting away with all that Homer gets away with, while possessing little to no intelligence. What man or woman wouldn't, at their evil, primitive core? And what man or woman wouldn't want to get away with all that Homer gets away with while being ridiculously attractive, unlike the real Homer?

So, Mindy is basically a win-win character. She's not only wish-fulfillment for fanboys, but for fangirls, too. And that's the sort of all-encompassing thinking The Simpsons writers at their best were terrific at.

Oh, but have I mentioned the absolute best reason Mindy's amazing? She has the piggish habits of Homer, has a good heart, is a smokin' hot babe, and she has the voice of Michelle Pfeiffer. Yowza.

Let's break this down:

This

Plus This

 

Equals This!

Admit it. We all want to be Mindy Simmons.

P.S. If you can get a copy of the DVD for The Last Temptation of Homer, listen to the commentary. Al Jean had it bad for Pfeiffer, and it's adorable to hear. Apparently, according to Jean, she's super, super gorgeous. One disappointing fact, though: that gargling sound? Broccoli and water. She didn't want to eat sweets. The hell? I love you dearly, Michelle, but I'd still rather be Mindy if that's what it takes to look like you and not her.